Guilt and Closure

When you lose someone, you're broken. You have nothing you want more than that person you had. You want her to come running back. You want to go running back to her. It's a normal reaction. Until you accept that your breaking up was probably for the best and these feelings aren't healthy. After your revelation you try your best not to give in, to never let yourself think that way. Just when you're about to succeed, about to forget the pain, she comes back, wanting you back.
What are you supposed to do? Give in to those ancient desires or think with your head and not let that happen? Try to make her understand that it's over. She has to move on. What if she refuses to move on? What if the whole episode leaves you with a feeling of guilt? What do you do then? After all, you don't want her to ruin her life over you.
You don't stop caring, ever. It was a part of your life and you don't want it to haunt you for the rest of your life. You want closure. But closure isn't for you alone. Like the chapter, even at the close your lives are intertwined. One's closure without the other's is incomplete and the best you can hope is that both of you get it as soon as possible.

Hope is a Bitch

I don't ever remember being happy. Not that I haven't been happy, I just don't remember those moments. Part of the reason is that nobody ever tries to understand when I'm not happy, or they fail if they try. And I seem to concentrate on those faults more than the joys. Now I don't expect anyone to understand me or try to understand me. But there's still the hope. It stays there, always.
That little thing that keeps you pining for a better tomorrow is hope. That little thing that keeps you alive is hope. And that little thing that causes your heart to break again and again is also hope. Hope is the most illogical feelings of all. There's no reason to have hope, but you need it and you find it, just to prevent yourself from imploding. Yet it's hope that makes you cry, when things don't go your way (even when you don't expect them too).
Hope is a reflection of your desires. You always have desires, therefore you always have hope. Since you have hope, you invariably have disappointments. Still all you have is hope. All you have is a hope that your other hopes don't prove to be unfounded. But in all likelihood, all you'll find is that hope is a bitch. Then you'll hope that hope doesn't break you.
Well, that's just sad.